A Wild Shinigami Life
by ryuutsukihime
Summary: It's a day off from shinigami work and everyone's hanging out! What's this? Everyone's drinking? Pairings and details inside! On hold
1. And so it begins

Silver: Uwahh! This is the first Bleach fic I've ever made!

Fire: You mean **WE**

Silver: sweatdrops Uh, right. Well anyway, this fic is based on the roleplay Fire and I did so I hope it's good. So half the credits go to Fire!

Pairings:

Byakuya/Renji

Ichimaru/Toushiro

Shuuhei/Kira

Ukitake/Kaien (Yes, he's alive!)

One-sided:

Byakuya/Ukitake

Shunsui/Ukitake

Byakuya/Toushiro

….urm, I think….that's all, I'll let you guys know when I think of more pairings!

Enjoy minna!

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Disclaimer: Bleach does not belong to me. It belongs to Tite Kubo-sama!

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A Wild Shinigami Life

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It was a bright sunny day. A young captain with spiky white hair scanned throughout the sixth division department with his bright green eyes, rushing as he walked. The boy then bumped into someone familiar, with an icy cold expression and black hair, clipped with kenseikens.

"Hitsugaya-taichou?"

Toushiro then said, "Kuchiki-tachou! I've been looking for you."

"What is it?" Byakuya asked.

"Well…" Toushiro looked around to see that no one was eavesdropping, and then whispered, "Renji said he needs to borrow…the soap."

Byakuya arched a brow. "What does he need it for?"

"I don't know, but this is what happened. When I was heading to the 10th Department, I found Renji searching around for something. His hair was a bit…messed up. When he suddenly spotted me, he rushed ahead and then dragged me into the forest. At first I thought he was about to molest me, but surprisingly, he only wanted to talk. He told me that he was actually looking for Kira Izuru in the 3rd Department but wasn't able to find him since he was the one who first got him into that condition. And so he looked in every other department until he found me. Renji…..wanted me to ask you…a favor and I agreed, unfortunately. Then I looked for you so I could ask you to borrow…" Toushiro looked around again and whispered, "…the soap."

"Why has he not come here to ask me himself?" Byakuya asked curiously.

"I don't know…" Toushiro answered truthfully, his eyes wandered off. "But he just needs to borrow…the soap…pretty badly for I don't know what reason."

"Tell him…" Byakuya started. "…that I am not going top let him borrow the soap until he gives me a reason."

"What am I, a messenger?" Toushiro asked with a sigh.

"Ah, what is the fuss about?"

Toushiro and Byakuya turned to see a very curious Ukitake Juushiro.

"Is something wrong?" he asked.

"Ukitake-taichou," Toushiro said, surprised. "Aren't you supposed to be in bed?"

"Ha ha…" Ukitake laughed. "It's no fun when I have to stay in bed all day. So…what _is_ this rare conversation about?"

"Well…" Toushiro said. "Renji got glue on his hair and-…"

He was interrupted by Ichimaru's entrance.

"Ohayo!" he said happily. "Whatcha talkin' about?"

There was this really awkward silence between the four captains.

"Well?" Ichimaru asked, and then repeated, "Whatcha talkin' about?"

"Ichimaru-taichou," Byakuya said. "Please use correct grammar when speaking."

"Not everyone has to be like ya, Mr. Perfect." Ichimaru shot back while smiling widely.

"Please accept my apology," Byakuya said with a bow. "Coming from a noble family, I have learned too much about perfection."

"So it may seem," Ukitake said to Byakuya. "I, too, am from a noble family and I don't even use that much of a formal tone." He then grinned. "Why not try using your perfection on Renji?"

"I have been speaking to Renji ever since he became the fukutaichou of the 6th division." Byakuya responded. "His reaction does not surprise me."

"Well, anyway, I'm bored here so I've gotta go," Ichimaru said as he turned to leave.

"Ah, matte Ichimaru-Taichou!"

Ukitake then flings himself onto Ichimaru's back. Literally. "Join the conversation for a little longer, ne?"

Ichimaru gave this creepy stare to Ukitake.

"Uhh...nani?"

Ukiatke asked, catching his stare. Ichimaru's smile grew wider.

"Let. Me. Go."

"If. You. Stay." replied Ukitake, smiling back.

"Is that a challenge?" Ichimaru asked. They both stared at each other for a long period of time as a gust of wind passed by.

"Shinsou!"

Ichimaru pulled out his Zanpaku-to and attacked Ukitake. Ukitake begins to run around, sweat-dropping.

"Whoa! Don't do that! We're in a building! What would Yama-jii say about this? Kuchiki-Taichou is gonna make me pay for the damage YOU caused!"

Byakuya slightly rolled his eyes. "What complete fools you are."

"Ahh...gomen, Rokuban-taichou," Ichimaru told Byakuya as he put his Zanpaku-to away, still smiling. He then grinned at Ukitake.

"Unless you'd wanna fight...Don't. Bother. Me."

"Aww, but let's continue our conversation! So please stay!" Ukitake exclaimed.

'Oh boy, what have I gotten myself into.' Toushiro thought as he sighed.

"Just let him go, Ukitake-taichou. Ichimaru's gonna bite your head off. Literally, if you know what I mean. He smiles so much that I can hardly see his face."

Toushiro quickly closed his mouth with his hand. 'Uh oh...'

Ichimaru stared at Toushiro for a while.

"Is that so...?" he asked while walking towards the shorter boy. Then he stopped in front of him.

Ukitake then called out, "Don't start a fight Ichi-"

"Thank you for the compliment!" Ichimaru told Toushiro as he patted him on the head. "You're a very observant little boy, aren't ya, Hitsugaya-chan?"

Toushiro snapped. "Say what...?"

He then tries to hit Ichimaru but couldn't reach him. "Who you're calling 'Hitsugaya-CHAN'! Huh? Huh?"

Ichimaru held onto the shorter boy's head, keeping him from trying to attack him. "What's the matter, Hitsugaya-chaaaaaann? Sensitive about your size?"

His grin grew wider as he once again patted Toushiro on the head.

"Be a good little boy, Hitsu-kin."

Toushiro crossed his arms and frowned.

"Riiiight, Ichi-ojisan."

He then went behind Byakuya, who just stared at the three of them, slightly amused.

"Hitsu-kiiiiiinnn," Ichimaru called to Toushiro like he was a dog. "Come out from hiding behind Rokuban-taichou."

Byakuya was didn't move an inch, didn't change his expression, but continued watching. "Iie, Ichi-ojisan, your smile scares me."

And with that, he continued to hide from Ichimaru, slightly nervous. Ukitake didn't do anything either except watched. Ichimaru then walked over to Toushiro, who moved around Byakuya to stay away from Ichimaru. Ichimaru followed after him, the two walking around Byakuya. They continued this for a few minutes until Byakuya stuck out his hand and stopped Toushiro by his head without glancing at the boy.

"Would you stop acting like two childish fools?" implied Byakuya as he stared at Toushiro with this really huge aura growing out of him.

"But I am a child. If you want to blame someone, blame Ichi-ojisan for trying to molest me." Byakuya continued staring at Toushiro and let go of his head.

"Ah, but you are older than you look, Hitsugaya-taichou."

"Ichi-ojisan is older, why can't you lecture him? Though I'm older than I look, the fact that I'm still a kid hasn't changed."

Toushiro looked over to Ichimaru, who closes in on him. He then continued to back away, this time towards Ukitake instead.

Byakuya did not shift his stare from Toushiro. "You are a captain, Hitsugaya-taichou. This is an inappropriate way for a captain to act."

He then glanced at Ichimaru. "You too, Ichimaru-taichou."

Ichimaru continued grinning. "Well, that's what you say, Mr. Perfect. Ya ought to have some fun ya know."

Byakuya didn't react but just stared at Ichimaru. Very eerily. Ukitake then tries to change the subject.

"Ah! How long Renji grows his hair in a day? Does he use some sort of shampoo? One time, when his hair was like waaaaaay short, the next day, I saw his hair like, WAIST-LENGTHED! I even have a video about it! Wanna see?"

Everyone stared at Ukitake for a long time. Ukitake sweat-dropped.

"I wanna!"

Ichimaru finally called out, waving his arm wildly. Everyone now turned to Ichimaru, sweat-dropping still (except Byakuya, of course)

"Wanna come Kuchiki-taichou? Hitsugaya-taichou? Someone even videotape him wearing --BBBBEEEEEEEPPP--! I think Renji was with Kira Izuru and Hisagi Shuuhei. I can't help but laugh ever time I see it."

Byakuya scoffed to himself. "Why is it that you are changing the subject, Ukitake-taichou?"

"Uh? Um, your soap...yeah that's right. Renji said he needs your soap right? Just wanna keep you amused. I-I mean, it's just something we could do...uh you know?" Ukitake staggered a little.

"I'm hungry. Wanna get something to eat first?" Toushiro asked suddenly.

"Ah, yes...Good idea, Hitsu-chan!" Ichimaru chirped after Toushiro's comment.

"My stomach is growling! Let's go out and eat; just the four of us captains! XD"

"Ooooh! There's this new place where they served excellent snacks and beverages! Wanna go? I also heard it's also runs by some of the shinigamis and some others. Afterwards, let's go watch the tape!" Ukitake grinned.

Secretly interested, Byakuya sighed to himself and followed.

"Ne, Juusan-taichou, how didja get a hold of that video, hmmmmmm?" Ichimaru asked Ukitake curiously.

"Well, I really don't want to spoil it but I got this from Shunsui, who gotten it from Ise, who gotten it from Kotetsu, who gotten it from Yamada, who gotten it from Kusajishi, who gotten it from Kurotsuchi Nemu, who gotten from Retsu, who gotten it from Aizen, who gotten it from Matsumoto, who gotten from Kira, who gotten it from Shuuhei. So in other words, Shuuhei taped it in private." Ukitake smiled.

"Nani? Matsumoto have it and not shown it to me?" Toushiro asked, surprised.

Ichimaru acted shocked. "I didn't know Kira was sooooo pervy!"

Toushiro sweatdropped and thought, 'Pervy? Kira's pervy? Didn't know he had it in him…'

Ukitake laughed. Byakuya, well, stared and kept going.

"Ne, Kuchiki-Taichou. Would you like to join our little conversation?" Ukitake asked, putting his hand on his shoulder, grinning. Byakuya brushed his hand away from his shoulder and said nothing. Ichimaru then placed his hand where Ukitake placed his on Byakuya's shoulder.

"C'mon, Rokuban-taichou," he said and grinned. "Don't be so stingy. A few words ain't gonna kill ya."

"Don't touch me." Byakuya responded as he removed Ichimaru's hand away from his shoulder, as he did for Ukitake. There. He said a few words.

"Aw, why can't you talk a lil more with us? We don't bite you know. And you don't need to be "Mr. Perfect" when you're with us!" Ichimaru exclaimed, his smile widened even more.

Byakuya still said nothing and thought, 'He sounds sort of like a molester.'

"Ah! Is that the shop?" Toushiro pointed towards a big building with a big sign and a couple of displays featuring cakes, drinks, and many others.

"Yep, Yep! That's the one!"

Ichimaru then suggested, "Let's go drinking!"

He then turned to Toushiro. "Oh yeah, I forgot that Shorty's under-aged."

"Hey! I can drink!" Toushiro crossed his arms.

"Yea right, Short Stuff."

"Can too! You just don't know it!"

Ichimaru then wrapped his arm around Toushiro's neck and grinned widely. "Then let's find out."

'Uh oh. Uh oh. What am I to do? I can't tell them I'm underage!' Toushiro thought slightly panicking.

"Fine. Bring it on!"

Ichimaru grinned in delight.

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Silver: What will happen to Hitsugaya Toushiro? Is he up for the challenge? Please r and r! Arigatou gozaimasu!


	2. Sake, sake, sake

Silver: Konnichwa, minna! o Hope you guys like the fic so far. Anyway, this is the second chapter of Bleach! Enjoy!

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Disclaimer: Bleach is not mine.

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In the shinigami restaurant, the four captains saw Shunsui there already. And it wasn't surprising to see him drunk. So they went to sit with him.

"Six cups of beer," Ichimaru called to the waitress.

Of course, one was for himself, one was for Ukitake, one was for Byakuya, one was for Toushiro, one was for Shunsui (another one) and…who was the last one for?

"Who's that last one for?" Toushiro asked Ichimaru suspiciously.

"Well, Shorty," Ichimaru said with a wide smirk. "Let's see how you handle two cups…if you can."

He then laughed. Toushiro sweat-dropped.

"Well, go ahead. If you can, that is." Ichimaru said tauntingly.

Toushiro glared at him before draining both his cups quickly. But just when he was about to finish…..

He began to spit out the substances and coughed.

"Ewwww…."

Ichimaru laughed wildly.

"You've…never drank before, Hitsu-chan?"

Toushiro glared. _Isn't **THAT** obvious?_

Byakuya sat quietly, watching the two without touching the alcohol himself. Shunsui then scooted closer to Ichimaru and patted his head, messing his hair up.

"Aaawww...kawaii lil' Ichi-chaaaaaan is sooo…kawaii!"

Ichimaru, on the other hand, wasn't as thrilled as he was.

"Quit it."

Shunsui kept at it, patting and patting his head. Toushiro watched in amusement. Ichimaru then slapped Shunsui's hand away.

"Aaaawww…" Shunsui whined. "Whazzuh matter, kawaii lil' Ichi-chan?"

Just then, Kira and Shuuhei rushed into the restaurant.

"Taichou!" Kira called his captain breathlessly.

"What is it, Kira?" Ichimaru asked, looking up at him.

"You MUST hide us!"

"What?"

"You see, Abarai-kun found out that we taped him cross dressing and showing it to everyone, and now, he found ou-!"

Kira was cut off by a raging Renji storming through the door.

"Kiraaaaaa…!" He growled menacingly.

Renji then turned to Toushiro and pointed furiously at him. "You…Kusogaki!"

"Me?" Toushiro asked innocently. "What did I ever do?"

"DON'T PLAY DUMB!"

Toushiro hid behind Byakuya, who stood up.

"Renji…?"

"Ah, Taichou!" Renji noticed his hair messed up with glue. "You see….uh…Hitsugaya put glue on my hair!"

He gave Toushiro a death glare.

"Did not!" Toushiro protested, still hiding behind Byakuya. "Well, I gave the glue to Ichimaru! He said he wanted to spike his hair like mine!"

Ichimaru pretended to gasp. "I would never want to do such a thing!"

"Ichimaru!" Toushiro called to Ichimaru in disbelief. "He's lying! He _knows_ that I gave the glue to him!"

Ichimaru smiled. "Well, to tell you the truth, I gave it to Kira."

Everyone turned to Kira.

Ukitake suddenly asked, "Kira? Is that true?"

Shuuhei sniggered next to Kira.

Kira hesitated and said, "Well…uh…after Ichimaru-taichou gave me the glue…I um, kind of gave it to Renji…but I didn't know he would be silly enough to use it for his hair…!"

Everyone turned to Renji now. Renji's face reddened, until…

Kaien burst in the restaurant wearing shades.

"Ohayo, everyone!"

Everyone turned to Kaien, who took off his shades. "Eh, are you having a party? WOAH, Renji! What happened to your hair?"

Everyone was amazed to see Kaien. Kaien then spotted Ukitake and started running towards him. He then jumped into his arms.

"Ukitake-taichou!"

"Kaien, you're back! By the way, it's not the morning!"

"It isn't?" Kaien looked outside and it was the afternoon.

The taichou and fukutaichou then noticed everyone staring at them.

"Ah, Kaien," Ukitake said as he happily took out a video tape. "You wanna see Renji cross dressing?"

"**Can I?**"

Ukitake then noticed a very dark aura behind him.

Renji jumped for the tape, calling out, "Give me that!"

Byakuya then used the tip of his Zanpaku-to to poked it through Renji's shirt and said, "Renji, let's clean your hair up. I can't bear to see this."

So Byakuya left, dragging Renji behind him as everyone else stared.

"No, I wanna keep dwinkin'…." Shunsui muttered loudly.

Everyone sniggered and tried not to laugh.

"So…you think Abarai-kun is going to forget about this incident?" Kira asked.

"Not ever in a life time," Shuuhei replied.

"Hey Kira," Ichimaru said. "Join us in drinking! You too, Hisagi."

"Well, uh…" Kira stammered. "I…don't drink."

"C'mon, give it a try!"

And with that, Ichimaru dragged Kira and gave him a cup, his grin widened even more. In 10 seconds, Shuuhei drank 5 cups of alcohol and still wasn't drunk, unlike a certain someone wearing pink who can't even keep his eyes open while drinking. Kira, on the other hand, still hesitated on drinking but Ichimaru gave an order that he SHOULD drink, so he wasn't sure. After staring at the substance for a while, he brought it to his lips and drank it a little.

"Come on, Izuru! Live it up a lil!"

Shuuhei pushed Kira's cup and made him choke it down all at once. Kira coughed and glared at Shuuhei, who was smiling at him, somewhat mischievously. Toushiro shook his head and looked over to Ukitake and Kaien. (So sorry, I dunno what they're doing but all I can see is a small packet of glue, a videotape, and playing cards -)

A few seconds later, Byakuya and Renji came back. Fortunately, though no one knew how they've done it, but Renji's hair actually turned back to normal, with his hair tied to a ponytail and everything. And strangely…he was grinning widely (hmmm I wonder what they've been doing all this time).

"Renji, join us for beer!" Shuuhei called to him. "Izuru joined in too!"

Yeah, that's right, Kira gave up and just kept drinking (it's his seventh cup) and he's drunk. Renji shot a death glare at Shuuhei.

"Don't think I've forgotten-!"

He was cut off when Shuuhei stuck a large bottle of beer into his mouth.

"You must be thirsty! Come on, drink up, Renji!"

Minutes later (or seconds) Renji was drunk as hell. Shuuhei and Kira was so relieved that he forgot about it.

Byakuya was enjoying his peace until Ukitake handed him a cup. "Come on, Kuchiki-taichou. Join the fun. Everyone but you is drinking."

Byakuya refused the offer. Ukitake didn't give up.

"Come on, Kuchiki-taichou." he said. "Even the under-aged shinigami is drinking, and you're not even under-aged!"

"Yeah!" Kaien joined in. "Chill out, will you?"

Byakuya sighed to himself as he took the cup and drank it slowly. After he was done, Ukitake said, "Good. Now drink more."

--**meanwhile…**--

Toushiro kept staring at his cup before looking up to Ichimaru.

"I'd rather have a bottle of soda. I hate sake."

"All right," Ichimaru said with a glint of mischief in his eyes (that never open). He took one of the bottles on the table and gave it to Toushiro. Toushiro drank it a bit, but spit it out quickly.

"It's sake!" he cried out.

"Nani?" Ichimaru asked, trying to act innocent. "No, it's not."

He took the bottle from Toushiro's hand and stuck it in his mouth (like what Shuuhei did to Renji). Toushiro struggled, flapping his arms wildly in the air, forcing himself NOT to drink. Ichimaru didn't pull the bottle away. Toushiro then pushed the bottle and made Ichimaru drink it instead. After he finished it, he said, "Eeww, Hitsu-chan, an indirect kiss!" but was still smiling.

"Don't even think about it. You nearly suffocate me and you still think it's more of an indirect kiss?" Toushiro glared at Ichimaru.

But, just as always, Ichimaru grinned even more.

**Anyways, back to Ukitake, Byakuya, and Kaien.**

"Kuchiki-taichou, you should really need to drink more."

"Excuse me?" Byakuya asked as he set his cup down. "You said at first that I should drink, not that I should drink _more_, Ukitake."

Kaien laughed. "Lighten up, Kuchiki-taichou. Another cup won't hurt you. See? Even Hitsugaya-taichou is drinking."

He pointed towards Toushiro, who was constantly being forced to drink a large bottle of sake by Ichimaru.

"So?" Byakuya asked rather bluntly.

"Just have some fun," Ukitake said as he handed him a cup.

Byakuya took it and said, "Fine. But this is the last one."

All of a sudden, Renji put his arm around Byakuya, very drunk.

"Renji," Byakuya said. "Don't. Touch. Me."

"Huh?" Renji asked as he failed to give Byakuya a straight face. "Whateva ya say, Taichou. Ya da captin'."

Ukitake and Kaien watched the two in amusement.

Renji was about to remove his arm, until he accidentally fell onto Byakuya's chest instead. After that, he fell straight asleep.

Byakuya seem very surprised, but amazingly, didn't show it. (dunno how'd he done it) He pushed Renji away and turned back to Ukitake and Kaien. They kept staring at the two, watching the whole time.

"Yes?" Byakuya asked with a slight glare.

"I-iie," both Ukitake and Kaien answered at the same time.

Silver: So…..whatcha guy think? To Shunsui and Renji fans….sorry for messing them up. I was only planning to put them….a third OOC. ;;

Arigatou gozaimasu for reading! Please review! I would like to know what people think of this story.


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